Time to tap the reserves of inner strength

It seems like the time to release Lilith is approaching even faster. At this point, her little body is not responding to her medication, and she just seems different somehow, like she's ready to go. Maybe I'm imagining things, but I've always known her heart, just as she has always known mine, and I see no reason why that would change now. Physically speaking, she still likes when I take her out in her stroller, but she doesn't ask to walk much these days. She's getting pretty lethargic, and isn't eating as much as she used to. I'm trying not to jump to conclusions and panic. We have a vet appointment for Monday, and once I have a professional opinion, I will react accordingly. I just hope that I can remain strong. I will give myself full permission to sob and hide under the covers for five solid days afterwards, but while she's still here, I want to be strong for my dog so that she doesn't pick up my anxious energy.

When I decided to adopt Lilith, I promised her that I would always be there for her, and that if she was ever scared or hurting, that I would hold her paw and cuddle her. I have kept that promise so far, and I plan to keep it until the end. Of course I'm only human, and can't suppress my emotions entirely, but I have to be able to function so that I can continue to care for Lilith properly. It's time to find the fountain of inner strength that life has already taught me I possess and use it to help me be a good friend to Lilith in the process of dying, just as I have been in life.